You tell me what's wrong with this list: Maddox, Zahara, Pax, Shiloh, Knox, and....Vivienne.
For starters, congratulations to American royalty Saint Angelina Jolie and Friar Brad Pitt on the birth of their fifth and sixth children, Knox Leon Jolie Pitt (a boy), and Vivienne Marcheline Jolie Pitt (a girl). They were born in Nice, France on Saturday via c-section.
There's no doubt those twinsies are already living a life of privilege most of us will never know, but I do feel sorry for one of them.
Poor little Vivienne Marcheline. Not only is she at the tail end of a long road of kid-collecting from her incredibly famous parents, but she got the short end of the stick as far as cool names are concerned. Maddox, Pax, Zahara, and Knox all sound like super awesome, butt-kicking action heroes. Vivienne sounds like a southern belle who wouldn't dare step out into the sun for fear of getting a freckle.
Four out of the six kids have an 'X' in their name for crying out loud! Where the heck did 'Vivienne' come from?! I understand the middle name, "Marcheline;" that's after Angelina's late mother. But couldn't they have thrown an 'x' in there to make little Vivienne feel better about herself? Something like Vixvienne? That has a nice ring to it. It also sets her up nicely to follow in mommy's light bondage footsteps.
Homegirl doesn't even get a cool nickname! I've heard Angie refer to Maddox as 'Mad' and Zahara as 'Z.' Pax and Knox don't require nicknames, their names are already legendary on their own. But what does Vivienne get? Viv? Vi? Poor little thing. And to top it all off...she's white. And you know that whiteness does not fare well in the Jolie-Pitt house. She's going to be a normal-named, neglected little blob. Someone call child protective services, stat!
That said, she is one of the 3 chosen ones who hit the genetic jackpot, and she'll probably be the hottest of the Jolie-Pitt clan. So while the other 5 are out being badass, she'll be out somewhere stopping traffic.
Make me proud, Viv.
